Father and son redneck adventure!

On this past Saturday night, Lucas and I had our first father-son redneck adventure. First, let me preface this by saying that we are NOT rednecks! I simply thought that my son, being a huge fan of cars, trucks, crashes, and jumping, would love the Monster Jam Truck Show at Alltel Arena. And boy did he!

Of course, the first rule of having a father-son fun night is that we get to break the rules! The show didn't start until 7:30pm, but his bedtime is at 7:00pm. 1 point for daddy for coolness! We arrived at the arena and I expected that on a 30-degree Saturday night, there would not be that many people at this 2-night event. The arena was packed! The parking lots were all packed and it cost $10 to park. Since I only had $1 in my wallet, I did the next best thing...I removed a road cone blocking a very convenient parallel parking spot right against the sidewalk on the east side of the arena! I parked, then placed the road cone back in its original position...no witnesses! Saved $10!!

I didn't have tickets yet, so I walked up to the window. The sign read "Adults 12+ $21.75, Kids 2-12 $11.75". I asked the lady behind the glass how much it would cost if the kid is not quite 2 years old. She replied "they're free". My son is 2 years and 3 weeks old. I didn't think...just reacted. I said "one adult please". Saved $11.75...up to $21.75 so far for the night! I took my ticket and walked up to the front door where the lady was checking bags. I had a diaper bag because my son naturally still uses diapers. She said they don't allow video cameras (I only had a digital camera anyway), but they do allow sippee cups for children. As she looked into the bag, she told me that they don't allow food products either. I realize this is a ploy to get you to purchase their $5 hot dogs, $4 popcorn, $8 cheeseburgers, and who knows what else. But, when she told me I will have to throw away his small snack-sized ziplock bag full of Teddy Graham Cinnamon Crackers and tiny snack-sized bag of Welsh's Fruit Snacks, I didn't think...just reacted. "But ma'am, he has severe food allergies and I can't trust the food cooked here. I know that these snacks are safe for him to eat," I pleaded. "Okay, I'll just pretend I didn't see them," she said. More points for daddy...and much more money saved! Dang I'm good! Come on...that's a stupid rule anyway! Don't act like you wouldn't do the same thing!

So, we enter the arena and I climb up to the third row from the top of the arena to avoid becoming the 3rd and 4th victims to die in one week from accidents at Monster Truck shows (referring to news stories from Washington state where a 6-yr old was killed from a flying drive shaft off a truck and some other state where a crew member was killed when he was actually hit by the truck...hit!! I mean, how do you not see or hear the thing coming?!?) We sit down in our seats and I quickly spotted a man 3 seats down on my left with a mullet eating Vienna sausages straight out of a can (he must have food allergies too). I noted several others placing ear plugs into their children's ears. I began to worry at this point. First, Vienna sausages make me vomit...immediately. Second, I have no ear plugs. I mean, how loud can a truck be?

The truck started up and revved up its engine...Lucas and I both immediately pooped our pants. It was so loud, my chest vibrated. I covered Lucas' ears with my hands as he sat on my lap. He didn't like that, so he pulled my hands down. The truck revved up its engine again...Lucas grabbed my hands and pulled them back up towards his ears. That is where my hands were for most of the show. Over the next 2 hours, we proceeded to watch these 6 trucks demolish 2 rows of cars, race, and spin donuts on the arena floor. Then, we watched about a dozen 4-wheelers race around the arena floor. Lucas LOVED that part. I couldn't hear the words coming out of his mouth due to the noise, but I could see his mouth going 90mph as he motioned his hands around in a big circle over and over again as if to imitate the 4-wheelers and encourage them to continue. Then, we watched some motorcross guys ramp over a 70-foot span with their bikes performing some pretty amazing stunts, including ramping up, standing on the handlebars in mid-air, and returning to sit before he crashed and broke his face.

Lucas had a blast! At 9:30, it was over. The smell of exhaust, Vienna sausages, and beer were entrapped in our clothes and hair. We gathered up the remains of his illegal bootleg snacks and headed to our illegal parking spot so we could get home. All the way home, he talked about the cars and big trucks that crashed and jumped and raced, and then HE crashed as we pulled into the neighborhood! BIG points for daddy! He's still talking about it 3 days later!

Here are the 6 trucks. 3 of them completely broke down by the end of the show! From left to right, they are "Predator", "Prowler", "Iron something or other", "Rammunition", "Ramminator", and "something else I can't remember".

They were crushing cars...not a very practical talent if you ask me.

Lucas' favorite part...the 4-wheeler races.

At the end of the show. He looks tired...and kind of redneck-like actually. And his poor lip looks horrible in this picture. I wish I could have taken better pictures of us together, but I didn't want Vienna sausage-man touching my camera to take a picture of us together.